Thursday, September 16, 2010

The Rings of Saturn: Truth Revealed

I remember well, learning about astronomy as a child... Making styrofoam ball planets, watching Bill Nye the Science Guy bike to where those planets would be proportionally in the galaxy... Learning mind-riveting facts about each...
Like Saturn. We learned that the rings of Saturn are made of meteor rock and ice, which apparently reflect light much like a rainbow does. I, however, have discovered that science has been deceiving us all along. Through experience, mostly that of losing countless "other" socks and virtually millions of bobby pins, I have made my own discovery, which is that the rings of Saturn are actually made up of just lots of lost stuff. Your dryer is an intergalactic transporter, which keeps only one sock of any given pair and SHOOTS the other one off into space, to be collected into Saturn's rings, where it is held to another by bobby pins. The same rule applies to lost luggage... It is also flung into space. In fact, all those things you say, "Now what did I do with that?" could well be attributed to the same galactic problem. So wonder no more where your screwdriver went, or why you can't seem to locate your 5-year old*. Saturn. It's all about Saturn.
*I do not actually advocate misplacing children and blaming it on a planet.

1 comment:

  1. I'm using this the next time that I lose something. Don't blame it on the sock monster.... psh..... poor guy doesn't even exist (since we all know monsters aren't real). :D